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Submitted on
September 14, 2013
Submitted with Writer


4 (who?)

Be warned. Up ahead lie strong language.

    Fuck fuck fuck, you thought desperately. It was ironic. Only one tooth had managed to puncture your skin, but one infected tooth was enough. You quickly pulled down your shirt sleeve to cover up the bite mark. While pretending to casually inspect your gun, Estevan walked into the room, breathing heavily, “Did you get them all?” he wheezed.

            You looked up, acting as if surprised, “Huh? Oh, yeah.” He smiled and walked over to you. “Any injuries?”

    “Nope. You?”

    “I’m fine. Why don’t we get out of here? We’ve got some pretty great scenery and all but… Areas like this are never good. Too many infected.”

    “Actually I was… Hoping we could stay here a little longer,” you spoke with a hopeful smile.

    Estevan sighed and glanced around at his surroundings, “Fine. Just a little while though.”

    You grinned and fished around your grimy backpack until you pulled out a cleaning cloth. You wiped the blood off of your gun and reloaded its ammunition. “Okay, all done here.” You handed him the supplies and he did the same.

    “Ready?” He asked.

    “Sure. Let’s go.” You both trekked out of the old abandoned house, guns at the ready. Occasionally an infected would approach you, stupidly stumbling around. By the time you reached the lake, the afternoon sun had cast a golden light on everything.

    You spotted a wooden pier and sat at the edge, ignoring Estevan’s pleading eyes to leave. A weak drowsiness began to overtake you.

    Estevan didn’t follow, holding his gun at the ready as he continued to survey the land. He occasionally called back to you, wondering if you were ready to go.

    You couldn’t hear him though. Your brain barely was processing anything. With shaking hands, you took off everything of value, and put them in your backpack, which you had removed. You checked your gun once more and took off your heavy jacket, which you folded neatly and set down by the backpack and gun.

    By this point Estevan had focused on your strange behavior, rather than the threat of infected. “Hey. You okay?” Squinting, he saw you had a weird expression on your face. “You don’t look so good. Come on, let’s get back to the house. We can grab any leftover supplies and move on from there.”

    You could barely make out any words except things like, like ‘hey’ and ‘house’. A pulsing feeling was starting to grow in your arm and you glanced down at it. It had turned red and purple. Your eyes widened and your conscience returned a bit. With all of your remaining strength, you pushed yourself up onto your feet and walked to the end of the pier.

    Feeling numb, you gazed out at the setting sun ray’s that reflected on the glassy water. Pinching yourself to make sure you were still alive and human, you breathed in as deeply as you could.

Longish explanation + notes + other shit.

To sum this up: You're living in a world with zombies. You get infected. You are living out your last moments as a human with Estevan.

I guess this is kind of similar to a reader-insert, but I just felt 1st
and 3rd person perspective were dissatisfactory. Also, I haven't made
Estevan's relationship clear with the reader. I kind of get the feeling
of lovers, but they could just as easily be siblings. It's definitely
not a parental relationship though.... I think... Idk. It's your choice!

I haven't done prose in a while, and I still think I move at too quickly
of a pace, but I've been working on it. (Seriously, if you took a look
at some of my earlier stories, you would be even more appalled then you

I also love ambiguous endings. Do you
turn into a zombie or kill yourself to protect Estevan? I think that Reader might have fallen into the water and drowned. Who knows.
Originally I had planned on a definite ending, but I've been going on a
French movie rampage lately, so I've realized the beauty and frustration
of non-definite endings.

Oh yeah, and the name Estevan is fabulous! I was reading a book with the name Estevan in it...!

One last note: The Reader doesn't have a gender/sex. You can decide your relationship with Estevan and how the story ended. Or you can just be lazy like me and not.

Wow! I really meant it when I said a bunch of shit, huh? Anyway, if you managed to get through that obnoxiously long description, thanks! And I hope you enjoyed the story!

(also I have a headache right now. since I know the state of my head is just that important to you)
Add a Comment:
Rosenfox Jan 3, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
*jaw drop*
I love this! This story was really interesting, I love the ending ^^
xrw Jan 4, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Ahh thank you! (Gotta love dem zombies)
Rosenfox Jan 4, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Definitely, zombies ftw XP
TheJDWiley Sep 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Awesome flash fiction! I love the ambiguity, especially in the ending with that final fleeting moment of full awareness. Kudos!
xrw Sep 15, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank you! :D
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